Regret the Error

Return of the British pseudo-apology

More here.

David Graveney says critics of the England coach should now write to say sorry.Simon Barnes tries very, very hard indeed...
I am indebted to David Graveney, your chairman of selectors, for suggesting that I write you a letter of apology. He says that such things never happen in the media; it is important for us all here at The Times to show how wrong he is.
I have, indeed, said some harsh things about you and about the England team you coached during the trip to Australia. I have, for example, said that England's record in one-day cricket under your stewardship was woeful and was likely only to get worse.
You have proved me wrong in a delightfully unexpected way. England have won four one-day matches on the trot, beating Australia, the world champions, three times in succession. As a result, England won the Commonwealth Bank Series, one of the most ancient and prestigious competitions in world sport. Your team have a trophy and an infinitely bigger and more imposing one than the Ashes urn.
A nation rejoices and, as Mr Graveney implies, I am forced to change my views on what went before. All of us who criticised you and your team must now ask ourselves: "Does it really matter that England were beaten 5-0 in the Test series? Does it really matter that the Ashes were surrendered? Does it really matter that this was England's worst showing in a Test series in Australia since 1921?"
I think the implication of Mr Graveney's epistolary demand is that I -and others who have criticised you and your team -should admit that we were wrong and eat a fair amount of humble pie.
For example, I was of the view that Monty Panesar should play in the first Test. I believed that picking Ashley Giles sent the message to the Australians that England were running scared. I also believed that failing to pick Panesar for the second Test was piling folly on folly.
I also believed that England went into the Test series underprepared, that in bending over backwards to keep the players happy, you failed to mount a significant challenge for the Ashes. But I have to confess that I was wrong on all these counts. I now see that England's 5-0 defeat was one of those flukes that occasionally happen to brilliant teams who are perfectly prepared. The fact that they happen more often to ill-selected and poorly prepared teams is irrelevant.
The fact that the undercooked Stephen Harmison sent the first ball of the series straight to second slip must also be overlooked, even if it did set the tone for the series.
I have also been slow to admit that Giles took three wickets for 262 runs in his two matches. I have been too eager to point out that Giles dropped Ricky Ponting on 35 in the second Test; it was merely a coincidence that Ponting went on to make 142 and England suffered their most traumatic defeat in cricket history. I now see that the fact that Panesar took eight wickets in the third Test only vindicates your decision in holding him back for Perth.
I admit that I felt that England losing the Ashes series 5-0 was a poor result.
But now, thanks to Mr Graveney, I realise that I attached too much importance to the competition. The fact that the Ashes lit up the entire country in the glorious summer of 2005 had gone to my head; likewise, the fact that the Ashes 2006-07 was the most eagerly awaited Test series in history.
I should be able to laugh off such a thing. Sure, the 5-0 defeat was disappointing, but it paved the way to victory in the Commonwealth Bank Series, didn't it? What more could anyone want? And if England go on and win the World Cup that starts next month, won't that make it all worthwhile? Won't it be the culmination of a masterplan?
I have suggested, Duncan, that you took England to the most humiliating Test series in Australia for 86 years, that you took a punt on damaged players being fit and lost, that you failed to pick a proven match-winning spinner, preferring a decent trier who can bat a bit, that you picked a wicketkeeper for his batting even though his batting had gone, that you took a team woefully short of preparation and so made a gift of the first Test, from which your side never recovered.
I apologise for having said all these things. I apologise from the bottom of my heart -because you brought us the Commonwealth Bank Series trophy.
England's tour to Australia was a triumph! Anyone who denies this is a fool! And I, fool that I was, had the temerity, the blindness and the impertinence to criticise your handling of a Test team, merely because they lost the Ashes series 5-0 in such a humiliating fashion. Can I ever apologise enough?
Yours in sport, Simon Link

Very sorry

From The Press of Christchurch, New Zealand:

On January 25, 2007, this newspaper published an article referring to prominent QC Gerard McCoy's involvement in the Fiji Law Reform Commission's review of the Fiji Penal Code.
Regrettably, there was a serious error in the article which gave the wrong impression that Mr McCoy's involvement in Fiji was improper and he had rorted the Fiji Law Reform Commission and/or the NZAID programme.
The facts are as follows: The project was to rewrite the Penal Code of Fiji and the Criminal Procedure Code. The project was put out to tender by the commission, and a three-person team from Canterbury University (comprising Mr McCoy, who was and is an adjunct Professor of Law at Canterbury, and two other academics) was selected from a number of Australasian universities to conduct the rewrite.
The price of the entire contract was $F80,000 and not $F200,000 as reported. Further, this sum was to cover all expenses, such as travel to Fiji to interview judges, lawyers, Government officials as well as the retention of specialist overseas lawyers and draftsmen with the requisite experience and expertise.
Accordingly, any remuneration Mr McCoy would have ultimately received would have been considerably less than $F25,000. It was certainly not $F426,845 (about $NZ492,500), as the newspaper wrongly reported.
In fact, Mr McCoy did not receive any payment from the commission. There was a disagreement between the Canterbury University team and the commission as to how the project was to be run, which led to Mr McCoy (with the approval of the University) terminating the contract.
Mr McCoy also consulted NZAID officials at the time. At the time of termination, the commission had made only one payment to the university of $F26,845. From that sum, a small amount was properly disbursed by the university to one of the other academics. The university sent back the entire balance, together with interest and a payment to cover foreign exchange movement, which was refunded to the commission in full. As stated, no payment whatsoever was received by Mr McCoy.
The same article wrongly stated that Mr McCoy was working closely with the military coup government. In fact, Mr McCoy has provided legal assistance to the Interim Civilian Government of Fiji on a no-fee basis on the drafting of anti-corruption legislation. He tells us, and we unreservedly accept, that his motive was to benefit the Fijian people in an effort to stabilise the political situation.
The newspaper regrets the errors contained in the article and sincerely apologises to Mr McCoy, his wife and his children for any embarrassment or damage those errors may have caused.
The newspaper is discussing an appropriate remedy for the errors with Mr McCoy.

Apology visa issued

IN an article headed ''Paper The Way To True Love'' which appeared in The Daily Telegraph on Monday, February 12, inaccuracies were reported pertaining to the operations of the Department of Immigration and Citizenship.
The story concerned spousal visas.
The Daily Telegraph acknowledges that the Department always employs stringent measures for assessing all spousal visa applications and every application is treated equally and on its merits.
An inference was made in the story that pressure was applied to the Department to help speed up the processing of the visa application. The Daily Telegraph accepts that no such pressure occurred and that the Department and the applicants at all times followed due processes and protocol during the visa application period.

Iran, Iraq...whatever

We described Mahmoud Ahmadinejad as the president of Iraq, in a trailer on our front page, US accuses Iran etc, February 12. He was restored to the presidency of Iran on page 15. Link

Gender trap indeed

The report "Gender trap" in Life on February 6 referred to transsexual Robin Bradbeer as male. Bradbeer is female.

Homophone alert

An article in Business Day yesterday about 10 companies that Ceres, a coalition of investors and environmental groups, says may not be paying enough attention to global warming, rendered incorrectly a word in a quotation from Mary S. Wenzel of Wells Fargo, who discussed the bank’s track record on green investing. She said, “We are certainly demonstrating that we are addressing risk and seizing opportunities” — not “ceasing” opportunities. Link

A very detailed explanation of why your paper was late

THE Kalgoorlie Miner apologises for being late yesterday after a flat tyre delayed the delivery truck by three hours.
Driver Anthony Tonkin, who let Merredin at 1.25am, punctured a tyre about 75km west of Coolgardie.
Workers from Kalgoorlie's Beaurepaires branch responded and fitted a new tyre within 20 minutes of arriving at the scene.
"It was just one of those things you can't help," Mr Tonkin said.
"Hopefully it won't happen again for a long, long time."

Alleged drug trafficker or president of the Dominican Republic?

In an article on drug smuggling in Venezuela that began on Page 1A Monday, an incorrect photograph was used on Page 2A for jailed drug trafficking suspect Feris Farid Domínguez. The error occurred in the newsroom production process. The photo that was used was that of Leonel Fernández, president of the Dominican Republic. The Miami Herald regrets the error. The correct photos appear at left. Link

Lock and load

A Feb. 3 story on a new hotline to report illegal guns said incorrectly that some weapons, like machine guns, are illegal for anyone to own. In fact, machine guns and other automatic weapons can be legally purchased and owned in Philadelphia with registration by the federal government requiring an owner's picture, fingerprints, a $200 fee and permission from the city police commissioner, according to John Hageman, regional spokesman for the U.S. Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco, Firearms and Explosives. Link

Fuzzy numbers etc.

Ceiling treatment: An article in the Feb. 11 Real Estate section about removal of "popcorn" ceilings that contain asbestos referred to the thickness of polyethylene sheeting in millimeters. It is measured in mils, not millimeters. A mil is one-thousandth of an inch. Link